First Review!! 😱 Love me Whole by Nicky James

Synopsis

Twenty-eight-year-old Oryn Patterson isn’t like other people. Being an extremely shy, social introvert is only part of the problem. Oryn has dissociative identity disorder. He may look like a normal man on the outside, but spend five minutes with him, and his daily struggles begin to show. Oryn shares his life and headspace with five distinctively different alters. Reed, a protective, very straight jock. Cohen, a flamboyantly gay nineteen-year-old who is a social butterfly. Cove, a self-destructive terror, whose past haunts him. Theo, an asexual man of little emotion, whose focus is on maintaining order. And Rain, a five-year-old child whose only concern is Batman. Vaughn Sinclair is stuck in a rut. When his job doesn’t offer the same thrill it once did, he decides it’s time to mix-up his stagnant, boring routine. Little does he know, the man he meets during an impromptu decision to return to college is anything but ordinary. Vaughn’s heart defies logic, and he finds himself falling in love with this strange new man. But how can you love someone who isn’t always themself? It may not be easy, but Vaughn is determined to try.

Review

Wow!!! Please bare with me there is some challenging vocabulary to use in order to do this book justice, if by any stretch of the imagination anyone with this condition comes across this blog/post I hope I have used the terminology correctly and by no means wish to cause offence if I have not.

I am utterly astonished at the amazing experience I have had reading this book. It has been the wee small hours of the night on several occasions where I have had to tear myself away from the pages out of pure necessity rather than want. I am not a fast reader but if I were this would most definitely be a one sitting read. I have never read m/m (homosexual content) stories before but find that it has been approached in this book with the utmost respect and decorum. I first wanted to read this after doing some research on DID after watching a movie called Split directed by M. Night Shyamalan. DID and all of its intricacies is fascinating. After visibly seeing an interpretation of it I wondered if I would be as enthralled by it in written word. The answer.... absolutely. Nicky James is a genius! This book tackled such an immense issue so tactfully and beautifully that its complexity was easy to embrace. Oryn and his alters are all so beautifully formed that it holds no boundaries of acceptance for the reader. You really can sense and see in your mind‘s eye their individuality. You as a reader identify with each alter as their own person as easily as if they were in the room with you. I found myself noticing and anticipating switches even before Vaughn had acknowledged them, I felt I knew them so well. Oryn, Reed, Cohen, Cove, Theo and Rain are fully formed characters in their own right and James has expertly given them each an identifiable voice that there is no question for the reader whom is fronting at any time. The addition of the perspective of Vaughn gives the reader a focus as Vaughn explores and learns so do we, I am in awe of this incredible piece of work and am under no illusion that it has become one of the best books I have read in my life so far. It might be said that the decision to make our lead characters gay was a huge risk but personally I believe it to be brilliant, there is some very mature content in this book that explores homosexuality on a level that I had definitely not expected but I was in no way affronted or offended by it. I admire how honestly it has been portrayed. This book has lead me on such and emotional rollercoaster. I have found myself laughing, smiling and even crying as these characters have burnt their way into my mind and my heart. Every moment Rain graced a scene I found myself utterly melting at his cuteness, Vaughn is an incredible character that cannot fail to warm your heart, his utter dedication, devotion and all consuming attitude to his life with Oryn is inspiring. (I think all of the ladies reading this book would find themselves craving such a man I know I do!) Their relationship is so heartfelt, their love is undeniable. DID is now a condition that has been brought to the attention of many through several mediums, which in itself deserves kudos to those responsible for it. Technology is providing platforms for discussion and awareness of all things more and more which is fantastic.

I genuinely feel honoured to now be a part of James’ readership and would wholeheartedly like to thank her for such a phenomenal read. This is the first, but most certainly will never be the last time I will read this book and I am sure each time I do I will learn more and love every word as if it were the first time I had set eyes on it. Thank-you Nicky James I feel truly humbled to have read such an incredible story.

**Disclaimer** I in no way wish to alter or sway anyone else’s view by anything discussed in this post. these are merely my own opinion feel free to agree or disagree as you see fit.

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